COVID-19 SPECIAL: ThinkingAloud

We have to reorder our lives because of coronavirus pandemic, and it’s hard

I feel a need to re-examine my old life, for there's no chance we will pick up where we left off, pre-pandemic

Last Sunday, I found myself standing outside the FairPrice supermarket at Toa Payoh Hub at 6.45am with a small group of other early risers, and strangely thrilled to hear this announcement: "The store will open in three minutes."

At the fruit and vegetable section, the FairPrice staff are calmly stacking the shelves as we shoppers rush around. When I get to the self-checkout area, a staff member is letting an older gentleman know that those in the Pioneer Generation now enjoy priority shopping on Monday mornings.

The mundane but vital work of supermarket employees and other essential workers used to slip past me unnoticed. Then, people who faithfully did their jobs day in, day out never seemed worthy of notice. Doing one's duty was not worth remarking on, and hence unremarkable.

What was worth remarking on?

Why, the exploits of those with power and money, of course, that is to say, the stars of tech, finance, politics, entertainment, sports, et cetera. Everyone's attention gravitated towards people who stood out, for one reason or another, including those whose chief skill was to grab the spotlight and keep it on themselves.

Now, a tiny, invisible virus has forced much of the world to come to a halt.

This time of pause and reset is disorientating. It has made visible what used to be invisible, and called into question what used to be acceptable.

Last week, the Financial Times, no less, ran a piece bearing the headline "It is time to make amends to the low-paid essential worker".

"Economies around the world are going into hibernation," observed Financial Times writer Sarah O'Connor.

"Governments that have imposed lockdowns to slow the spread of coronavirus are focused on how to help the millions who have been put out of work. But not everyone is hunkered down at home. Essential workers must go out to keep the lights on and their fellow citizens fed. This has exposed an uncomfortable truth: The people we need the most are often the ones we value the least."

As the old gives way to the new, I feel a need to re-examine my old life. A recalibration is in order, surely.

To refuse to respond to the tide of change sweeping across the planet is to bury one's head in the sand, hoping against hope that after a month or two, we will all pick up where we had left off, pre-pandemic.

Not a chance.

DUTY OF THE MOMENT

For me, the two questions that I grapple with are: What is the need of the moment? And what is the duty of the moment?

The two are related, of course, but let me start with duty.

Duty and personal freedom pull in different directions.

Duty speaks of what we owe to one another, by virtue of us being human or as a result of our particular place in life, say, in a family, country or job. It may also arise from our character or from the moral expectations of ourselves, so wrote an early Roman philosopher by the name of Cicero.

Duty has its detractors. Among the fiercest of these was German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche, who lived in the 19th century. "What destroys a man more quickly", he asked in his writings, "than to work, think, and feel without inner necessity, without any deep personal desire, without pleasure - as a mere automaton of 'duty'?".

To Nietzsche, duty was an oppressive force that reduced thinking, feeling human beings to mere automatons.

I admit I have conflicted feelings about a life lived out of duty. For surely there is something unhealthy about making life choices purely on the basis of what others expect of you?

And yet, the current pandemic has exposed the hollowness of choices based on the belief that each of us has a right to exercise his or her personal freedom at the cost of harm to the community, especially its more vulnerable members, such as the elderly and the sick.

ST ILLUSTRATION -CEL GULAPA

So how do we go about finding the right balance between duty and personal freedom for ourselves, even as disruption and uncertainty swirl all around?

The current upheaval has spurred me to revisit an old concept I had read about but never taken truly to heart. It is the concept of the duty of the moment.

The duty of the moment is what you should be doing at any given time, in whatever place you find yourself.

This crisis has focused attention on those who are faithfully performing their duty of the moment, none more so than nurses, doctors, contact tracers, cleaners, transport and delivery workers, supermarket employees, law enforcers and journalists - the ones now tagged as "essential workers".

So what about the rest of us who are not so essential?

Jokes about how we can now save the world by sitting on our couches were good for a laugh, but the reality is that many of us struggle with how to be useful at this time.

Yes, we know we are to stay home and leave the house only when we need to buy essential items and to access essential services. We are to work from home, help our children with their home-based learning and use technology to stay connected with one another from the safety of our separate homes.

But the truth is, with the drastic slowdown in the economy, some of us may not actually have much work to do.

Our routines have been turned upside down, and even as we learn to navigate the new norms of working remotely and meeting virtually, we are often assaulted by anxiety.

NEED OF THE MOMENT

If we are to find a way forward, we must first come to grips with what is happening around us, name the changes we find most disconcerting and outline some concrete actions we can take.

In other words, I would say the need of the moment is for us to help one another process the chaos around us, the changes forced upon us so abruptly and the sense that our very futures are slipping away from us.

In other words, we need to have conversations about how we are feeling. We need to talk about our fears and our confusion, and we need to listen to one another and be patient with one another.

Even as we do our physical duty by staying home so as to break the chains of viral transmission, we also need to tend to our mental health, which has come under strain.

Some of us are better equipped than others to face this disruption. Some may be more shielded from the economic downturn that is upon us. But even those of us who still enjoy some measure of security know things can change suddenly.

Like you, I have more questions than answers.

As we each grapple with the questions that weigh most on our hearts and minds, let us remember to be kind and patient with one another, and with ourselves.

I came across a post on social media that seemed to me to get to the heart of our current need. It was a conversation between friends.

One of them, Rabbit, said: "I'm afraid."

"What are you afraid of?" asked his friend, Bear.

"I don't know," said Rabbit. "I just am."

"Then, I will sit with you until you're not afraid any more," said Bear. "We will face it together."

Let's face our fears together, and help one another get through this.

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A version of this article appeared in the print edition of The Sunday Times on April 05, 2020, with the headline We have to reorder our lives because of coronavirus pandemic, and it’s hard. Subscribe