Believe it or not, there exists in this world a Christmas tree ornament that is a cross between the Chinese God of Prosperity and Santa Claus. The figurine is of a portly male wearing the hat and garb of Caishen, the Chinese deity, but with the face of the jovial white-bearded man we have come to think of as Santa.

I cannot, with any degree of certainty, say whether this figurine is Santa cosplaying as Caishen, or the other way around. Either way, I find looking at it mildly disconcerting. Yet, there he is, Caishen Claus, staring at me from my tree, an unsettling reminder of the depths to which my friend gift exchange has sunk. After all, I was actually relieved to take it home. Somebody else got a set of anatomically accurate life-size human eyeballs made of gummy candy.